dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
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