She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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