I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
