It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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