alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
