I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
my liver is dry heaving
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
that is very illegal...i love you.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
