Your tits are I can't wait for
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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