I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize