Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
