Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I think my fart just growled at me.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
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