bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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