Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
oh god was she eating orange peels again
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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