I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
