I wanna bring you to show and tell
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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