My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize