Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
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I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
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There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck