I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
