I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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