He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
