he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
