Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
