My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
