She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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