so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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