I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I didn't shave. On purpose
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Randomize
