i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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