Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize