Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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