Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
