there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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