Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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