Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
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