? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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