xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
