Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
