It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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