I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Your penis caused this!
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