You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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