i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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