I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
