god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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