So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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