I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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