super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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