This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Randomize
