I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
