What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
