i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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