Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
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