Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
