I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
