He is an equal opportunity slut.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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